Soap Box Rantings

A Little Morning Chuckle

2009-10-09T06:27:00.000-07:00

Obama's Nobel Peace Prize is cracking me up this morning. My morning radio show, Brian and The Judge, played a recent clip from Saturday Night Live's recent parody (the one that poked fun at how little Obama has accomplished thus far) followed by the news that our president had been awarded the prize.

Is that not hilarious?!? You could be a die hard Obama supporter and still appreciate the humor in that sequence... I'm assuming.

Listening to more liberal news networks' responses to this announcement was a bit shocking. They seemed to be as surprised by the news as I was, some of them stating that their initial reaction was "for what?" BUT... the Norwegians cleared up the seemingly widespread confusion by explaining their reasons for awarding our President the Peace Prize. He is a man of peaceful vision and intent. Duh!

I laughed the hardest this morning when I read through the list of past winners to discover that our president has joined one of my personal heros, Mother Teresa, on the list of winners.

Editorial

2009-09-18T18:19:00.000-07:00

It's usually not the case, but sometimes it's good to know that someone's got your back...

Local Firm Should Have Gotten Contract

Housewife Rambling

2009-02-23T09:38:00.000-08:00

Preface: Everyone is entitled to lead their life in the way she chooses.

This time of year is a time when a lot of my friends get busy and therefore are, for all practical purposes, unavailable. Ironic that while they are swamped with their activities, I am in the midst of simplifying mine. I had been feeling of less worth than those around me for giving up the contributions I make outside my family, but I'm thinking that it's o.k. that I can't do my best as a mother/wife/housekeeper while still juggling a handful of outside volunteering. Society's reaction to housewives makes me feel selfish for not contributing a ton of time to my community, but I'm reminding myself that this is the same society that supports and even encourages cohabitation out of wedlock, the society that believes in abortion as a form of birth control, and the society that believes that children will fare just as healthily when raised in institutions such as day care instead of by their moms and dads. I profoundly disagree with so much that society deems acceptable and preferable that it's crazy to think its value of housewives should be taken into consideration. Unless my volunteering is directly related to my children or my God, it has been officially cut from my life. Unless this volunteering only requires my time when my husband can keep my children, it has been cut from my life. As I get older, I realize that the contributions I made through my volunteering were truly selfish. I felt as though I needed to nurture the "me" that I was away from my family. My real obligation to my community is to parent in a way that produces healthy, responsible, mature adults who will make the world a better place.

There was a time when I thought I would have no choice but to go back to work. Between student loans, legal fees, tuition, gas bills, etc., we just didn't see a way to ever gain footing over our finances. I began to search for openings in schools and get my resume and portfolio in order. Then it dawned on me-- even if we never make headway on our finances, I made a vow to God to do my best to raise my children in The Faith. How could I call working 40+ hour weeks my best effort at raising responsible Christians? How could I even claim to raise them when I would be leaving them in another person's care for almost half of their waking hours? Instead, I prayed, waited, budgeted, cut back, and focused on my housewife duties. A few months later, God showed us a new path that would allow us to take more control of our finances sooner. Yes, if I went back to work, we would be debt free except for our house in just a few years rather than an decade, but working would cost much, much more than we would earn.

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http://www.komu.com/satellite/SatelliteRender/KOMU.com/ba8a4513-c0a8-2f11-0063-9bd94c70b769/95903676-80ce-0971-0068-80139e602a04

This article is highly amusing. First, I believe that Rep. Still is confused about what a stay-at-home mom is. I find it hilarious that she makes the statement that we need to move women into the workforce rather than out of it. No one is suggesting that women be pushed out of the workforce; at-home-parent does not encompass women with no children. Second, I'm failing to see how $600 a year is going to ensure that those mothers return to work when their children are grown. Third, as far as I am concerned, 16 years old is not grown. I'm not sure how I feel about balancing the child-care tax credit with this measure. I'm really not sure that either are wise.

Enough Said

2009-02-18T12:10:00.000-08:00

There is no better way to spend a cloudy day than crazy dancing with toddlers and pairing Norah Jones with the pages of a book.

Epiphany

2009-02-17T08:20:00.000-08:00

This post may be more intimate than usual, but I had this epiphany that I feel like needs to be shared.

There is an incredible difference between sex and making love. Until recently, I was one of those women who felt a husband had a right to sex. It was something that a wife was semi-obligated to provide. Women like this combat SO many emotions because of that mindset. When sex is something a woman is obligated to, and wives feel this obligation, they will treat it as such. The obligation creates feelings of being treated like an object, of guilt if the frequency lessens, of self-loathing as a result of acting outside of one's personal desires. Sex as an obligation makes women feel similar feelings to those that frequently arise from having sex out of wedlock. It doesn't feel right. Sex can leave a wife feeling justified for selfishness because she has paid her due to her marriage. Now she can ignore her husband because she did his this incredible favor. I'm not sure if husbands feel the full effect of these emotions, but I have to believe that husbands of such wives also feel guilty because they are made to feel like they are taking advantage of the women they married.

Making Love is almost the opposite. Instead of being able to "take it or leave it," a wife longs for the emotions that come from the truly sacred expression of love. Making love provides feelings of safety, of gratitude for the husband God has provided. Until a couple has experienced love making, intimacy in all aspects of their relationship are lacking, even if they are unaware of the depth that has not been explored. A wife who is blessed to make love to her husband looks forward to the connection she will find. She does not worry about the physical aspects of sex but rather is eager for the emotional intimacy that will be created. It is no wonder this intimacy is one that God created and intended for the holy bonds of marriage. Making love provokes a desire within a wife to find fulfillment in all aspects of her marriage and provides the map to that gratification.

Commoners

2009-02-11T09:39:00.000-08:00

Like royalty would view peasants, our D.C. politicians view the general public of the United States. How dare Congress and the president assume the mentality that they do not need our approval to spend trillions of dollars over the past 5 months! Perhaps worse is the supposed belief that we, the "commoners," do not care how our money is being spent. If the current stimulus is passed, taxes will potentially fund new schools in local districts, dog parks, renovations or expansions of city zoos among other agendas that should be left to local tax levies and propositions. I, for one, do not find Milwaukee's school districts to be a valid debt for MY children to assume. I, for one, care about the bills that will come due 30 years from now. Shocking that a commoner would care about her financial future and that of her children! I, a commoner, am smart enough to understand that getting in over one's head means years and years of crawling out from hole that was dug even if it was dug for valid reasons. I learned today that a trillion dollars is like spending 1 million dollars a day since the birth of Christ. Seriously?? Perhaps the leaders of our nation believe that if they pick a number large enough, it will be over the heads of the commoners. Maybe we'll all throw up our hands and turn a blind eye to the uncomprehendible amount of debt that we will be stuck with long after the majority of today's decision makers have left the nation's capital. Whatever happened to the responsibility to give our children a better life than we had?

I believe that it is our responsibility to speak up to our representatives. This site provides contact information to Congress members and Senators.

http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/

While I'm sure that their inboxes are saturated with emails similar to this blog entry, prehaps mine- or YOURS- will be the one that resonates with a D.C. decision maker.

Decisions, Decisions

2009-02-11T08:36:00.000-08:00

It seems like a bazillion women in my life are prego right now. Every time I hear about a new pregnancy, I feel incredibly excited for the moms in my life, and their happy news makes me very antsy to make a decision about our own family planning. For the moment, my husband and I have decided to finish remodeling our new home, move in, and then re-assess our life. Almost tripling our living space, the move will hopefully be a sigh of relief because we can breath and move around without stepping on each other. It will hopefully mean an easier housekeeping job because we'll have storage space and a washer and dryer in our home. God willing, it will mean graduation from a 2 bedroom house to a 4 bedroom house with plenty of space for another baby. HOWEVER, I am completely aware of the possibility that this house could will mean higher bills, more floors to vacuum, more bathrooms to clean, and more lawn to keep. I am certainly not confident enough to set my heart on a baby yet.

One of my weaknesses is not being able to tolerate decisions that have not yet been made. I don't like my life to be up in the air. Waiting for my first marriage to play itself out made me crazy. Not knowing where I would teach after college was torture even though I only spent about a month in the application/interview process. When I was pregnant, waiting for the gender ultrasound took all my patience. I am a preparer. As soon as I knew I would be a single mom, I set to work finding a way to support myself and my daughter. When I was hired at OHS, I spent months familiarizing myself with the content, literature, and school. When my husband was hired post-college, I assumed the duty of replacing his fraternity T's with business attire and re-budgeting our life to take a commuter's huge gas bill into account. When I found out the sex of my babies, I immediately began clearance shopping, crocheting, and decorating in the appropriate colors.

Not knowing if my family is complete drives me nuts. Hopefully we'll finish the house in a timely manner and either clean out the baby items that are in storage or start examining a the timeline for a spring or summer bundle of joy. Even though I'll be sad for a while if we don't have another child, I think that I'll be relieved to have the uncertainty decided- whatever the decision may be.

A

2009-02-03T20:13:00.001-08:00

All day today, I debated apologizing to my daughter for last night's events. I really couldn't decide if I handled the situation horribly or if I'm actually a push-over parent most of the time. Perhaps I finally handled the situation effectively. In the end, I decided on a different measure altogether. I took the hour that she was in gymnastics tonight to focus my energy into something more constructive. I hit the local Hallmark and chose a Willow Tree "Angel of Learning" figurine for her. Then I found a card that read: "I'm so sure you're going to do well... I'm already celebrating your success!" I added, "I know that there's an 'A' student in you. She's only hiding behind a few late papers. Let's work together to get her to come out! I love you! Love, Mom"

Tonight when we got home, we read through her social studies chapter in preparation for tomorrow's test. The kid amazes me. After we were finished, she was able to name names of people from the chapter and random information that I would never have remembered now, at 25, much less when I was 8. She has an amazing ability to catch and remember almost everything with very little effort and sometimes without appearing to be listening at all! True makings for a successful student (and also the reason her teacher has trouble with her talking)-- if we can just put that memory to use with assignments and deadlines!

I've made it my personal mission to prove the teacher wrong from here on out. On several occasions, Teacher has "sympathized" with me by comparing her son to my daughter. "My son was disorganized and was never going to be a gifted child. He struggled with school all the way through high school and never got much more than C's and D's." All you teachers out there-- please, PLEASE don't compare your mediocre children to the children in your classrooms- especially not in conversation with the parent! I personally believe (yes, I know I'm the parent and probably biased) that my kid is very intelligent. I think she has way more potential that I ever had in school- maybe in life. Although this year's teacher is less than helpful in empowering my daughter, I truly believe that in 3rd grade, it is more important that a child learn that she CAN earn fantastic report cards than it is to teach her that in the real world there are no second chances. THAT lesson, we can save for... 4th grade.

F

2009-02-02T18:44:00.000-08:00

Tonight I failed as a parent. I jumped onto the online grade system to discover that Juliet's grades had slipped from A's and B's to include 2 F's!! Upon further investigation, I discovered that these F's are due solely to missing work. Missing work that she had told me was turned in on time. Grrrr... This news came in the midst of preparations for tomorrow morning's play date birthday breakfast, so I was more stressed than usual. I didn't yell at this point, simply stated to my daughter that she was not to spend time on her favorite book series until I was given proof of submission of all missing work. Then I instructed her to write the poem that was missing in the 10 minutes that were left before bed time. Then began the attempt at offering excuses for ALL 4 missing assignments topped with a request for help writing the poem. I just lost it. Raising my voice as much as I dared with a sleeping 14 month old upstairs, I told my daughter that she was on her own for this one. I had worked very hard all last semester with little effort on her part, and I was NOT helping her with this one. Further, when she finally finished the poem and asked if I wanted to read it, I said that when it came back with a grade, I would love to read it, but right now I would only get angry. Then it was bed time. Ugh...

Immediately after the bedroom door closed, I googled "motivating kids in school" for some ideas. The first thing I found: "Swallow your frustration and show as much positive energy as you can muster." Yeah, I blew that one out of the water. I then visited half.com to purchase Bright Minds Poor Grades by Michael D. Whitley, Ph. D.. I'm hoping it helps!

So in reality-- 2 classes were legitimately bad. The other was 100% prior to the missing assignment. She deserved to be reprimanded big time, but certainly not by an obviously frustrated mother. I did an awful job of masking my anger with firmness.

Doorknobs and Handles

2009-01-29T11:02:00.000-08:00

I love entertaining though I'm guessing no one would know it. I've always been the behind-the-scenes type. In jr. high and high school, I worked costumes for the drama productions rather than auditioning for the spotlight. I'm a writer rather than speaker. I'm the one who's generally behind the camera, in the planning stages of something rather than leading the event. I used to accept this as fact, but in the past couple years, I've started to force myself to expand my horizons. I started by heading up classroom parties that left me with no choice but to play hostess while saving myself the stress of being thought silly by my guests (7 year olds are generally excited about anything that takes them away from a math book). When it comes to planning parties for adults, I'm envious of those women whose invites are received with excitement rather than obligation, whose parties are lively, comfortable, and a genuinely good time for all in attendance. I feel like I have a handle on the decor, food, etc, but when it comes to actually keeping the awkward silences and early departures at bay, I sometimes feel like I'm groping in the dark for the doorknob. This year, I'm hoping to get a grip on entertaining by hosting an Independence Day Celebration and include in our invites some of my husband's co-workers (the ones who picture us living with outhouses and dirt floors out here in the stix!), a Housewarming party to welcome our friends to our new home when we move, and a kid-friendly New Year's Eve Party.

Today I Am

2009-01-22T19:13:00.000-08:00

My heart and prayer went out today to the March for Life. My feelings on abortion span across the emotional spectrum. Some days I am painfully angry with the sect of the nation who feels justified in stifling life. Some days I'm saddened by the loss of such precious gifts. Some days I am amazed that the gift that so many couples yearn for with all their beings could be so carelessly tossed aside, that there could be a woman in the world who wouldn't cherish every SECOND that God allowed that tiny life to be a part of hers. Some days I am hopeful because I know there are so many prayers, so many efforts being offered to save thousands of unborn children.

Today, I am sympathetic to the women close to my heart that have chosen abortion, chosen an early end to the lives of their children. I love these women dearly, with every fiber of my being. Today I long to erase the affect that I have seen abortion have on each of them. I long for the children I am unable to spoil, to get Christmas pictures from, to watch grow up. Today I am proud of the obstacles that some of these women have overcome, obstacles of regret, longing, self-loathing, of constantly wondering what that son or daughter would have looked like on his or her 1st birthday... 1st day of kindergarten... high school graduation. I pray that all women who have chosen abortion will find peace within themselves, knowing that God forgives all repentant hearts, and that the death of so many precious lives will not be in vain. Those women can reach out to the millions of scared, confused, helpless women in crisis pregnancies and share their stories. Today I am proud of the women in Washington D. C. who regret their abortions and who were brave enough to speak out on behalf of their children who could not be there to speak for themselves.

A Baby's Prayer

(song by Kathy Troccoli)

I can hear her talking with a friend

I think it's all about me

And how she can't have a baby now

My Mommy doesn't see

That I feel her breathe, I know her voice

Her blood, it flows through my heart

God you know my greatest wish is that

We'd never be apart

But if I should die before I wake

I pray her soul you'll keep

Forgive her, Lord, she doesn't know

That You gave life to me

Do I really have to say goodbye

Don't want this time to be through

Oh please tell her that I love her, Lord

And that You love her too

Cause if I should die before I wake

I pray her soul you'll keep

Forgive her, Lord, she doesn't know

That You gave life to me

On the days that she may think of me

Please comfort her with the truth

That the angels hold me safe and sound

Cause I'm in heaven with you.

Nobody's Perfect!

2009-01-22T15:23:00.000-08:00

First true rant in a while...

Ok, I CANNOT STAND people who have problems owning up to their faults. I am certain that I can be counted in the category more often that I'd like to admit, but I absolutely HATE it when people can't just apologize. Why is that SO hard? Perhaps some people are raised with an expectation of perfection, made by parents or whoever they looked up to to feel like they, themselves, were failures if they failed at a task. Whether a failing marriage, a crisis at work, a ruined project, or a blatant offense, so many people cannot find their own role in the negative situation. I'm sure it's human nature to get defensive when called out on something, but shirking the blame onto someone else or trying to find a mistake in the other person just to prove that he or she is no better?? That just makes the person look like a child trying to lie their way out of being caught with a hand in a cookie jar. I believe that taking responsibility for mistakes (or not) is a direct reflection on a person's maturity and integrity. Maybe I'm the only one who feels this way, and maybe I'm not, but I would very much appreciate people taking responsibility for their roles in like- the accomplishments... AND the mistakes.

PS- March for Life reflection is in the works!

Gratitude

2009-01-20T06:24:00.001-08:00

Today we say goodbye to a presidency that truly protected life. I believe that President Bush will be remembered for two huge accomplishments.

Thank you, President Bush, for protecting us. I cannot imagine how many of your plans were altered just a few months after you took your own oath of office in 2001. So many plans you must have had for the country. In an instant, we were all reminded of the most important issue of all: our safety and freedom. For a few months, the country rallied behind your protective measures. You were successful. The country felt safe again. That safe feeling allowed us to feel invincible while you were left to battle the threats to our safety alone and even with opposition from your country's citizens. Thank you for having the courage to ignore approval ratings and focus on the information that we as citizens were not privileged to have. Like a father protecting his family, you knew that your first responsibility was to give us a safe home. Solving the rest of the nation's issues would have been meaningless without a safe place to live. I believe that we will grow realize and have gratification for the sacrifice that you made to keep us safe.

Thank you for protecting those whose lives were newest with the same passion with which you protected the rest of us. Your presidency held the fewest abortions in recorded history. You stood firm in your belief in the sanctity of life and will no doubt be remembered as the most pro-life president thus far. Thank you for having the determination to not only speak on behalf of unborn babies but also to ACT on your beliefs and convictions to protect them. By your example, you have taught me what it truly means to stand up for my morals.

I pray that your efforts and progress will not be reversed. May God hold President Obama in the palm of His hand, directing our new leader's conscience and actions to be in line with the plan of our Heavenly Father.

Mmmm....

2009-01-13T20:29:00.000-08:00

I'm in a blogging funk-- I probably have six half-hearted posts started and saved, but none with substance worth publishing for the world. So... in an effort to break through my block I'm forcing myself to post tonight. This morning I found myself out of pancake mix for my son, so I reverted to a recipe that was given to me by my husband's high school sweetheart and ex-fiance who married his fraternity brother. Why I am very happy to have my husband's ex-fiance in my life is a story for another entry... But one reason is this recipe which proves that made-from-scratch pancakes are a hundred times more scrumptious that anything that a grocery store box can offer!

Buttermilk Pancakes

From the Kitchen of April

Ingredients:

2 C Flour

2 tsp baking powder

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

2 T sugar

2 eggs

1/2 C oil

1 3/4 C "buttermilk" (pour 1 T lemon juice into a 1 C measuring cup and fill the remainder with milk. Then add remaining the 3/4 C milk)

Beat together eggs, oil, and buttermilk. Add sugar, salt, powder and soda and stir until dissolved. Add flour and stir until moist. Additional milk may be added to create a thinner pancake.

Temporary Guests

2008-12-18T20:07:00.000-08:00

In the confessional last night, I was told to remember that children are "temporary guests in your home." I'll leave your imaginations to determine what my confessions were, but this tidbit has been on my mind all day. For me, it is extremely difficult to put my husband second in my life sometimes. God first. That's a no brainer. Marriage second. Children third. Huh. How in the world does a person make sure she prioritizes correctly when children, particularly babies, are so dependent and needy? How is everything to get done if evenings are spent in a spouses arms? More and more, I think that I need to simplify my life. My list of extracurriculars, while not lengthy, is extremely time consuming. In the summers, coordinating a pageant takes up insane amounts of time. That obligation overlaps with PTA as the school year kicks off. Coordinating label collection, meetings, open houses, and fellowship events keep the calendar cluttered. Photography is intermittent, but around the holidays it gets almost unbearably swamped, and I'm left to decide whether to neglect my children during the day or my husband at night to get the work done. Teaching weekly Wednesday religion classes, taxiing to school and kid activities, and volunteering in the library dictate my schedule for the week. I'm left with maybe an hour a day with my husband most of the time. While it is true that raising children is a temporary phase of a marriage, it is the rest of the world demanding chunks of time that lead to neglect of that union. In all honestly, were I to cut out my external obligations, I think I would be a much better wife and mother.

Happy Birthday

2008-12-04T19:03:00.000-08:00

I'm sure we all have those friends who we love dearly, but life paths just don't allow the friendship to remain intimate. Today I woke up, and the first thing I thought was, "It's my best friend's birthday today." This is the friend who grew up with me since the 4th grade, the friend who was exciting to be around, complimented my quiet "listener" self fantastically, was the first person I told about my teenage pregnancy, stood as maid of honor in my wedding, and who I haven't seen and barely spoken to in almost 15 months. Today I am sad. I don't know my friend anymore. I couldn't guess who her boyfriend is, what street she lives on, or what her favorite meal is. She has never met my youngest daughter. I know this friend through Facebook albums and statuses now. I do my best to keep up as I'm sure she does with me, but I miss so much the easy conversations, the silliness, the intimacy of that friendship. We've long since replaced each other as "closest friend," and while I know better than to think we could be there again at this point in our lives, I wonder if it's possible to revive a friendship. I used to think that it was my pregnancy, my marriage, the assumption that I was no longer interested/available/allowed to spend time with my girlfriends that caused us to venture in different directions, but maybe it was neglect, laziness, and a loss of ability to relate to each other. How quickly our most precious friendships can fade...

Getting into My Hair

2008-11-19T22:24:00.000-08:00

Tonight I'm tempted to write about how much I think it stinks that relationships come with drawbacks. But instead... I'm focusing on the face that I LOVE MY HAIR! Seriously, if there was one hair type to be blessed with, mine is it. I have an unruly, thick, coarse mess of curls with a few patches of straight mixed with the kinks. Sounds insane, but SUCH a fantastically fun aspect of my life. I have the convenience of throwing my hair into a messy pile and having it look intentional. My locks can be styled in any number of ways and keep the look all day. It is possible to wash my hair, skip brushing, and have a fantastic hair day. I can place crazy accessories amidst the strands of insanity and pull them off as subtle. My sense of style (when I actually spend time on it) is largely inspired by my hair, and while not for everyone, I like a little eccentricity in my life!

My hair over the years has amazed me. When I was little, my hair was undeniably blonde. Platinum? No, but blonde nonetheless. Moreover, is was THIN. It was so thin, in fact, that my mother was concerned about my health! Somewhere between 3rd and 4th grade, my wispy curls took on a life of their own, and sometime in high school, my blonde darkened to brunette with the exception of a few natural highlights that save me tons of money at the salon! Though I'm sure there are others, I do not know another white girl who looks for hairstyles via African American celebrities. Currently, I'm working on Jessica Alba in Honey (might take a few more months), but I've also sported an Oprah-inspired style and a few others.

Straightening my hair is always an option. Although I occasionally like to take on an alter ego, I feel as though I'm cheating on my curls for a very long 2 hours with the straightening iron~hardly a satisfying affair! This morning, I washed my hair, brushed it enough to get rid of the tangles, used two bobby pins to pull back a couple strands, and finished with hairspray on my ends. 3 minutes flat. It doesn't get much easier than that!

Testament

2008-11-16T20:05:00.000-08:00

I desperately want to take my daughter to the March for Life in D.C. This year, I'm too nervous given the new administration that will be in place. But next year, I want my daughter to be able to march beside me as a testament to a baby who was given life. When I think of abortion, my mind immediately jumps to girls who were in situations like mine. I was 15, thought to be a virgin by virtually everyone I knew, and faced with the life-changing plus sign in the window of a pregnancy test. What enters my mind next are rape victims and victims of incest. What never seems to be obvious to me are the married couples who choose abortion. While on HopeAfterAbortion.com today, I discovered a very different story of abortion that made me think that perhaps my children who were conceived within the safety of marriage have just as much reason to march in D.C.

An excerpt from the testimonial:

"...I wasn't told that I would come to hate all those who advised me to have my abortions, because they were my accomplices in the murders of my babies. I wasn't told that having an abortion with my husband's consent would end up causing me to hate the father of my children, or that I would be unable to sustain ANY satisfying, lasting, fulfilling relationships.

I wasn't told that I could become suicidal in the fall of every year, when both of my babies should have been born. I wasn't told that on the birthdays of my living children, I would remember the two for whom I would never make a birthday cake, or that on Mother's Day I would remember the two who would never send me a card, or that every Christmas I would remember the two for whom there would be no presents.

My abortions were supposed to be a "quick-fix" for my problems, but they didn't tell me there is no "quick-fix" for regrets...."

http://www.hopeafterabortion.com/hope.cfm?sel=C18L

I admire so much that these women are using their mistakes and sins to help other women. Someday, according to God's perfect timing, I hope to share my story to touch the lives of other women...

Prayer for Healing

2008-11-14T06:14:00.000-08:00

Eternal Father,
Source of all mercy and love,
out of love for us you sent your Son,
and willed that blood and water
flow from his side to cleanse us of sin
and restore lost innocence.

Hear the cry of each woman who mourns
the loss of her child to abortion.
Forgive her sin, restore her to your grace,
and still the terror of her heart
with a peace beyond all understanding.
Through the intercession
of the Blessed Virgin Mary,
Mother of all tenderness and our Mother,
strengthen her faith in you.
Give her the consolation to believe
that her child is now living in the Lord.
We ask this through Christ our Lord,
who conquered sin and death,
and who lives and reigns with you,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Text by Rev. James Moroney.

http://www.hopeafterabortion.com/hope.cfm?sel=G84D

Intercessions

2008-11-12T15:21:00.000-08:00

The Pro-Choice movement has been weighing more heavily on my heart than usual. Perhaps it is because of the new pro-choice president who will take his oath of office on January 20th, just two days before the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade and the annual March for Life in Washington D.C.

Intercessions for Those Involved in Abortion

For those who are tempted by abortion,
that God may plant in their hearts
a love for the treasure of life
and the strength to protect it;
we pray to the Lord:

For all doctors,
that inspired by their oath to protect life,
they may know the grace of repentance,
serving others as true disciples
of the Gospel of Life;
we pray to the Lord:

For all nurses,
that inspired by the gentle compassion,
of Mary, the Mother of God,
they might serve as guardians of life
in every moment of its existence;
we pray to the Lord:

For all hospital administrators,
that with wisdom and respect for life,
they might lead those who work with them,
for the nurturing and protection of all life;
we pray to the Lord:

For parents who have lost a child to abortion
and whose hearts are closed to the mercy of God,
that they might know the grace of repentance,
confession and the healing embrace of the Father;
we pray to the Lord:

For parents overwhelmed by grief and remorse
at the loss of their child to abortion,
that Jesus the shepherd,
so rich in mercy and compassion,
might heal their broken hearts;
we pray to the Lord:

For all who counsel the parents of aborted children,
that God might reward them for the crosses they bear and grant them the words of wisdom to lead lost souls home to him,
we pray to the Lord:

For each child aborted from his mother's womb,
that from their place in heaven
they might intercede for their mothers and fathers
for peace and healing and the gift of true repentance;
we pray to the Lord:

Thus says the LORD:
In Ramah is heard the sound of moaning,
of bitter weeping!
Rachel mourns her children,
she refuses to be consoled
because her children are no more.

Thus says the LORD:
Cease your cries of mourning,
wipe the tears from your eyes.
The sorrow you have shown
shall have its reward,...
There is hope for your future. ...

Jeremiah 31:15-17

http://www.hopeafterabortion.com/hope.cfm?sel=G84D

Sugar Coating

2008-11-12T09:08:00.001-08:00

It occurred to me recently that there are a lot of opinions of me that other people don't share- at least with me! For me, it drives me crazy to watch someone have a completely skewed view of their life and experiences! It's none of my business, so I have no grounds to offer an outside opinion. I generally keep my mouth shut and wait for opportunities to ask for clarification for things I find backward. I've been wondering lately where the line is drawn between obligation to point out destructive behaviors to someone and respect of keeping my nose in my own life.

If I decide to err on the side of minding my own business, I run the risk of always having a little less understanding of where a person is coming from. Who knows? Maybe it's my own views and opinions that are out of left field. If I keep my concerns to myself, more than likely nothing will change. Unstated opinions will continue to be thought, actions will repeat themselves, and relationships will never been deepened.

On the other hand, pointing out hazardous activities in another person's life will very likely end up destroying a relationship- friend OR family! Here's why. One of three things will happen. I will come to a better understanding of where someone is coming from and have a worse opinion of the judgement, I will hurt feelings to badly that they will be not be mendable, or the relationship will be strengthened by a deeper understanding of each other.

Is it worth the risk?

Frankly, the people who aren't so close to me are worth the risk but not necessarily worth the effort, and the ones who are closest to me are higher risk but more worth that risk... Obviously, it's horrible to gossip about someone when that person isn't around, but how bad is it to think those thoughts and keep them secret? I honestly think that I'd prefer the important people in my life voice their concerns about me so that I can explain my logic and listen to their points. Hopefully I would be able to deepen my friendship and improve myself!

I think relationships are like M&M's. They're all sugar coated, bright and colorful at a glance with the exception of some brown ones. Quality relationships have the richness of chocolate inside. In some quality relationships, there's nuttiness within the riches. The decision of whether to break through that sugar coating to get rid of the nut lies in the hands that hold those particular M&M's.

18

2008-11-09T19:09:00.000-08:00

I just finished grading the weekly newsletter for 3rd grade. Eighteen misused commas. EIGHTEEN!! Eighteen in 2 pages! Yikes. Here's what I'm learning this year:

* Although I LOVE my daughter's school and its mission, a teacher makes or breaks a year of education in any classroom, public or parochial.

* It is possible for a child to have a fantastic time at school even while struggling with studies.

* Teaching my 8-year-old a lesson in education should not mean docking points for late papers as much as inspiring her to WANT to excel and love to learn.

*Teachers need to know the material they teach.

* Commas do not come between the subject and predicate of a sentence. They do not separate two actions in the predicate unless the sentence is compound. Commas should be placed on the inside of a quotation mark. "I think that's correct," I said.

Essentials

2008-11-06T19:23:00.000-08:00

My sister and I were musing today about depressions- as in the financial, country in chaos type. I started thinking of all the things that my family could do to cut back before losing our home. My husband and I choose our splurge items wisely enough. We have never had satellite TV or even an antenna, and we don't plan to get either. We don't have long distance on our phone line, and when we move will reduce that to only our cell phones. We grocery shop at Aldi's, use Parent's Choice diapers, and shop season clearance for our clothes and welcome hand-me-downs. Our house is tiny, but our mortgage payments are equally small. Our car has almost 1/4 million miles on it. It may seem like we live simply, but if push comes to shove, there are SO many things that we can eliminate from our life:

Dining out. This is one comes in waves. We don't do the sit down restaurants much anymore now that our bill is typically close to $50, and that's with water in our glasses. Drive thru's are a much bigger obstacle as it is SO much easier to get a salad, apples, or chicken nuggets than dragging three kids into the grocery store sometimes!

Gas. Our life would be SO much less stressful without this expense. At the worst, we spent $900/month in gas. Unbelievable. Thank GOD gas is less expensive- for now. In a crunch, my husband would stay in the city all week and visit us on the weekends, and I would stop taxiing to school each day which leads me to...

Education. Private Education would never be an option. This could save tons of gas money and also tuition.

Phones

Internet

Air Conditioning

Disposable Diapers

Store-bought produce and meat...

Do I think we will be making dresses out of feed sacks anytime soon? No. But I can easily see having to cut back to the essentials. Not just the items we need for comfort, but the items that are truly cornerstones for safety and health... house, job, food, warmth, love, God. What an eye opener nation-wide financial hardship would be for the instant gratification, carefree generation to which I belong. I am SO very appreciative tonight for the luxuries in my life!

God, Family, and Country

2008-11-04T20:14:00.000-08:00

By nature, I'm an observer. At a party, I'm one who's content to listen to others' comments and watch others' silliness. Professionally, I'm a leader only when appointed as such, and I state opinions only when I feel they're fresh, valid, and vital.

This election has lead me to be more brazen, more dismissive of the opinions of others, and more solidified in my morals, values, and opinions. I equate this election to my recent custody battle. Simply put, I was too soft, too vague, in my testimony, and my opponent was oh so good at swaying the public opinion- even by beginning every request for a fact with, "I believe..." so as not to be caught in a lie. On the day of the hearing, I was calm, feeling that I'd followed God's lead on this one and knowing without a doubt that all was in God's Hands. In the end, I was unsuccessful in many of my goals. The changes I was hoping for did not come about, and I had to take a deep breath and prepare myself for the 11 years ahead of me. This was a new plan, a new path that I could never have planned for myself, but I didn't doubt, and have never doubted, that is was God's plan that won over my own. I received my loss quietly and without regrets. I took my day to cry, to brace myself for what was to come, and then I focused my efforts on my ultimate responsibility, my daughter. She was the reason I had fought so hard and sacrificed so much, and she needed me more than ever. My daughter was all the more precious to me after my fight for her.

My country will surely, good or bad, be faced with CHANGE as promised, but my priorities will remain the same- 1) God, 2) family, and 3) country. I will continue to praise God for the blessings of life and freedom, continue to protect and improve my family's life, and continue to stand as a proud military wife. I found myself tearing up during Senator McCain's concession speech tonight. I can't tell you the gist of what was said. I can't tell you the comments made afterward. What I can tell you is that I watched a man with visible love and pride for his country give sincere thanks for his ability to continue to serve and protect her.

About Soap Box Rantings

2008-11-01T14:59:00.000-07:00

Soap Box Rantings is a site dedicated to my most extreme tirades and is not meant to be digested by anyone in particular. By nature, I am a peace keeper, non-confrontational, and have the complete capability to smile and nod to opinions I disagree with. This is my "get it out of my system" spot, the space when I vent my feeling at the very time I'm writing them and don't stop to calm down before posting.

Vile

2008-10-31T20:09:00.000-07:00

*** Within this post are FACTS mixed with my opinion of those facts. Do the research people- Google...***

By now, I've made my decisions about the local issues and have been trying to hunt down the facts about each presidential candidate. Tonight I watched Barack Obama's address to Planned Parenthood (link included below). I know and love a few Obama supporters, but I really cannot believe that any of them have listened to this speech!! Filled with the most vile and irresponsible views I've ever encountered, I was sick to my stomach (literally) 5 minutes into the speech. Most claims about the candidates I take with a grain of salt, but when I can sit and listen to the words from his mouth, there's no denying his beliefs.

Barack gets wild applause for the comment that women should decide when and how many children they have in their family. Heck yes, they should! However, stupid women who get drunk, use unreliable contraceptive, have promiscuous sex, or use no protection at all, make their own beds!! As my husband told me tonight, pregnancy is not a virgin disease!!! What Barack seems to be really saying is that women are irresponsible or too stupid to know how to avoid mistakes. In another clip of him I watched, he said he wouldn't want his daughters punished for their mistakes by an unplanned and unwanted pregnancy. Sounds to me that we have not only a candidate who is pro-choice, but pro-abortion. This man did not get up before Planned Parenthood and promise to respect their mission; rather he sounded more like the leader, trying to encourage the group and vowing to help them in whatever way he could. He called the dissatisfaction with abortion "flawed ideology." I have a hard time finding what is flawed about wanting every pregnancy to be planned or at least conceived in a safe environment. It is not flawed to want women to be more responsible with their sexuality. With freedom comes obligation, and the freedom to open one's legs to whomever one chooses should come with the obligation to deal with the results. Barack seems to support women who resent and discard their babies for getting in the way of their orgasms. Obama says that teenagers shouldn't be consigned to a lifetime of struggle due to a lack of access to birth control. Sure, but I fail to see how that justifies "terminating a pregnancy" as some like to say in order to dance around the dirty word, "abortion." 9 months of shame and embarrassment will not lead to a lifetime of struggle. No pro-lifer wants to force women to raise their babies, just give them LIFE!!! As if this evidence isn't enough, the fact that Obama failed to vote in favor of the Born Alive Infant Protection Act (which would require medical attention to babies who survive abortion instead of leaving them in waste pans to die) is the icing on the cake. My conscience simply won't allow me to vote for these missions...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUl99id2SvM

Oh the Power of One!

2008-10-30T06:56:00.001-07:00

I am currently in the process of documenting the issues with my child's teacher, and tonight I am FUMING! As a disclaimer, I freely admit that my daughter tends to be on the scattered side when it comes to school work. She would much rather socialize than take her time on her assignments or pay attention when it is time to turn them into the teacher. I've been on her case about this problem and talked to her teacher several times about the issues at hand. It basically boils down to this: papers do not make it out of her folder. She brings her assignments home, completes them, takes them back into school the next morning, and in her backpack they sit. TWO assignments in the past week have not been accepted even though they were completed and at school on time. I've explained to her teacher over and over again that the papers are COMPLETED and AT SCHOOL ON TIME. The lady seems to refuse to help get them into the stack with the rest of the students' work. I have SO had it with people like this! Typically, I prefer to delete these people from my life or at least limit interaction as much as possible, but I have seven more months before that will be an option for this individual! Seriously, am I asking too much for the teacher to spend a few days checking my kid's homework folder for assignments when they're collected? I think a week of checking would help remedy the problem. Am I being one of those overly-demanding parents? Currently, I'm making lists of what is in my daughter's folder every morning before she goes into school and pointing out to the teacher when something was at school on time but counted as late because it didn't make it out of the homework folder. This subtle method seems to be getting me nowhere. My next course of action will be to email the teacher daily with the assignments that I saw Juliet complete and take to school with her. After that, it's into the classroom each morning to personally see that my kid's papers are turned in. I'm very certain that I'll begin this morning ritual within two weeks. Really?? She'd rather me take my 11 month old and 2 year old into her classroom every morning than take an extra second to look at her student's folder? My kiddo, meanwhile, is oblivious to these issues (as she should be) and isn't terribly concerned with the late marks. I'm trying to figure out the lesson the teacher is trying to teach or the point she's trying to make, but the only lesson I'm learning so far is to avoid this particular teacher with the rest of children at all costs- even if that means pulling them out of the school I love so much for the year. Oh, and I'm also reaffirming my belief in the power of the individual- her power to spoil a school year, and hopefully my power to fight for my kid while she does nothing but enjoys being a 3rd grader.

Lesson #491

2008-10-21T07:25:00.001-07:00

I like to think that I've lived and learned from my life and will continue to do so. Here's lesson #491 that came particularly slow for me. Girls of all ages have a desire to be loved, needed, and appreciated. That kind of lasting, grow old with me scenario that lets you marry with no fear and spout "this one is THE ONE" after a few weeks of dating. This desire, while perfectly natural and genetically imprinted in the human female, has evolved into a mutant being, motivating women across the globe to do truly stupid things. Case in point: ME.

At 13: I spent embarrassing amounts of time reading and watching Romeo and Juliet (the one with Leonardo DiCaprio as Romeo) and saw the plot of the as one of the greatest testaments to love ever imagined.

Hindsight: R&J is about stupid teenage girl driven by her emotions and a horny teenage boy who meet, elope after knowing each other less than 48 hours, and die in the name of love for a practical stranger. Whether we like it or want to admit it, when we throw sex into a relationship, women get attached- even without the commitment of marriage. There's an underlying obligation to make the relationship work, because, after all, a girl can have lots of boyfriends, but she becomes less appealing, less "marriage material," with the increase of notches in her bedpost.

At 16: I was married, driven by the obligation to make a relationship work.

Hindsight: Marriage does not change a man, it only magnifies him. Take the good and bad things about any male, add a marriage license, and the sum is a larger dose but the same ratio of good and bad. This is why women need to be SMART about their relationships, not emotional. We need guys who are "good on paper." They don't have to be rich but driven, don't have to spoil a girl with gifts but be generous, don't have to be geniuses but must have common sense... you see where this is going. It is not judgmental but SMART to have a list of prerequisites for a potential boyfriend or spouse. Items that were added to MY list post-divorce: 1) a man smarter than me, 2) a man with a clean lifestyle, 3) a man with a promising career, 4) a man with respect for money as a necessity but not a #1 priority, 5) a man who TRULY VALUES COMMITMENT.

At 20ish : I dated a business owner, a soccer player, a soldier, a photographer among others, and finally settled into an exclusive relationship with a computer programmer/analyst.

Hindsight: This was my "learn how to date" period. I know SO many women who have had boyfriends but never REALLY dated, but dating is what allows a woman to look pragmatically at men to see if there are any real potentials. Dating is like interviewing an employee. It's a time to examine the candidates, look at their resumes, and weed out the ones that don't fit the job description. Next comes exclusivity, a time when you hire the guy but for a probationary period. This time allows for further research and a chance to check for chemistry between the two people. Engagement is when the guy is hired on as a permanent employee but with the understanding that he will have periodic reviews and can be let go without a severance package. Finally the option of marriage. If the guy shows true compatibility, the ability to lead, and exemplifies appropriate values, he earns a 50% share of the business responsibility and profits.

At 25: Married to the programmer, popping out babies every couple years because we just can't get Natural Family Planning right, and loving the fulfilled desire to be TRULY loved, needed and appreciated.

Hindsight: To Be Announced...

Orange Cookies

2008-10-19T18:57:00.000-07:00

Look to the left: clear floor, clear couches, everything in it's place. Look to the right: piles of folded laundry, backpacks, clutter. These days, I take the house one room at a time. With 900 square feet for a family of 5, there aren't enough spots for everything to have it's place. Instead, I relish one clutter-free room at a time. Today it is the family room that serves it's intended purpose. The dining area becomes a hall closet, laundry room, arts and crafts room, and office. Tomorrow I'll make it my goal to sort through the items on the counter and table so that we can actually have a family dinner. By Tuesday, my hallway will have turned into the laundry room again, and it will be time to spend the day washing, drying, and folding. We have been house hunting off and on for 3 years, and each time we thought we had found our future home, something would come between it and us. Our realtor assured us that God had the perfect house for us and would show it to us according to His timing.

I'm not one of those parents who finds it necessary that each child have a separate bedroom. Right now, my 3 children all sleep in the same room. The living space in a house, however, is essential for the health of a family. A family should have space enough to gather comfortably for meals, a kitchen that allows for the enjoyment of holiday baking and the passing on of family recipes, and a family room with enough floor space to roll back the rug and dance. These are the great blessings that God has been saving for us.

My grandmother died 7 years ago, and my grandfather joined her in Heaven last April. Growing up, my family gathered in my grandparents' home for holidays and filled the house with laughter, love, and the inevitable after-dinner debate between the men in the family. In a few short weeks, my family will have the privilege of purchasing this house. I will cook in the same kitchen where my grandmother made orange cookies and kept home-made bubbles under the sink for us. My family will enjoy the fireplace that was the center of so many of my Christmas Eves. I will be spending evenings on the same balcony where my grandparents watched hummingbirds feed and deer raid the feeder in the valley. I know so many stories from within the walls of this house, and what a perfect way to be able to remember my grandparents and share my stories with my children. Hopefully we'll make many more happy memories to be passed to younger generations and again fill the Stack home with laughter, love, and the inevitable after-dinner debate.

Why I Pay for Private Education

2008-10-16T16:55:00.000-07:00

Growing up, I thought private schools were attended by children of rich parents and designed to keep their stuffy kids with other too-good-for-public-school families. I never imagined that I would be a parent of a parochial school kid. I didn't make a deliberate decision to enroll my daughter in private schools; I procrastinated too long, and she was put on the waiting list at the cheap preschool I had intended to send her to. Thus, she ended up at St. Patrick's school. Then I graduated with my degree in English Education and began teaching at a public high school. At 21, I thought my biggest problem would be teaching the 18 year old senior writing classes I'd been assigned (seriously, what was the administration thinking there?). As it turned out, my biggest beef was the issue of Separation of Church and State. I completely understood the need to respect other religions provided their beliefs weren't hurting others, but teaching English was SO difficult for me because my faith was a natural part of my life. I had to deliberately ignore that it existed between 8 and 3 each day. Before 8AM, I would play Christian music in my classroom for myself and those of my students who stopped by, but it had to be turned off when the bell rang. I walked on eggshells my first year of teaching as I tried to find the line between standing up for God and my beliefs and staying within regulations. I HATED that I was in an environment where God seemed unwelcome or at the very least ignored.

After teaching in the public school system, I couldn't fathom moving Juliet out of her private school. Being a private school mom isn't easy and certainly isn't for everyone. Although tuition is reasonable, my annual costs are doubled by the cost of transportation to and from school each day. And the monotony of taxiing back and forth day after day... makes me reconsider my commitment to Catholic education sometimes. But it's worth every penny, every minute spent behind the steering wheel. If Church and State are to be separate, I choose the stand on the Church side of the line. Each day, I send my kid to an environment where God is welcome, faith is shared openly, and the students get excited about praying together- even within the walls of the classroom.

Id-i-o-cy: n. extreme folly or stupidity

2008-10-15T19:33:00.000-07:00

I've never been one of those people who yells at their TV, perhaps because I'm not one who watches sports. Tonight, however, I found myself grumbling, "Idiot" in the direction of both candidates during the final presidential debate. Let me preface this tirade by reminding you all that I take everything from either candidate's mouth with a grain- or shaker- of salt. Tonight's debate was strung with overly-idealistic comments such as suggesting that all American parents will begin to instill a desire for learning in their children or that Head Start is a great program that has the potential to create genius children. Here are a couple comments that I find myself on my soap box about.

Since when is a college degree a person's right? I absolutely disagree with both candidates on this issue. They talk about the perfect world where everyone who wants to can attend college but with no mention of hard work on the part of the student. Heaven forbid we expect kids to work their tails off for scholarships or to save money for college. How dare we expect students to work during the school year and live on Ramen. No, instead we should offer student loans, lots and lots of them, so that when those students graduate or drop out, they're left with a pile of debt that makes the worth of the degree debatable. When did we begin to devalue education so much that we found it not even worth the sacrifice of living the stereotypical "college lifestyle?" Idiots.

I found it interesting that each candidate cited what he believed to be the responsibility of Supreme Court judges. Obama suggested that a judge's job was to ensure "fairness and justice" (find dictionary definitions rather than assuming you understand what he means) while McCain stated that their responsibility was "upholding the Constitution." Just throwing that out there in case I want to revisit it later.

Abortion- women are in the best position to decide? I know all you feminists out that will cringe at this opinion, but I have SO been there with the insanely huge number of single girls facing an unplanned, crisis pregnancy. I was pregnant at 16 and sat in Planned Parenthood while the "counselor" began to give me the literature with my "options." Let me tell you all that the idea of my ultraconservative parents finding out about my predicament was enough to send me to an abortion clinic. I can't imagine the magnitude of the decision when the mother is already out on her own. The thought of handling a child alone or backtracking her life and moving back in with her parents have to feel dreadful. Most mothers with crisis pregnancies don't think they can handle the baby, and they're probably right. But really, how selfish is it not to be willing to handle the pregnancy, the embarrassment, ridicule, judgment, and distortion of the figure? "Studies within the first few weeks after the abortion have found that between 40 and 60 percent of women questioned report negative reactions.^3,23,35 Within 8 weeks after their abortions, 55% expressed guilt, 44% complained of nervous disorders, 36% had experienced sleep disturbances, 31% had regrets about their decision, and 11% had been prescribed psychotropic medicine by their family doctor." (http://afterabortion.org/complic.html) Women in crisis pregnancies are NOT in the best position to decide whether or not to abort. Idiot.

I will give Obama props for suggesting that we need to educate young people on the fact that "sexuality is sacred." I believe the problem is not of educating but of convincing, and I doubt that we see a public school teach about the sacredness of sexuality any time soon.

Highlight of my viewing? Senator McCain's use of the word, "Cockamamie." Hilarious.

Cautious Optimism

2008-10-15T06:47:00.000-07:00

Too many people decide how to vote in the presidential election based on the performance of past presidents. How about voting based on the past performance of the candidate? What a concept! The images portrayed on the campaign trail are not to be trusted. Anyone with a little common sense would be on his best behavior if placed in the center of the nation's media. The idea that we, as a nation, listen to these men (and woman) explain themselves and take them at their word is ludicrous! Some might call it trust, but I label it naivety. Come on! How many manipulative, self-serving people walk this earth? If they weren't so practiced in manipulation, I think we'd all find it a shocking number. The election is not a time to ignore warning signs and trust your first instinct. It is a time to seek out facts, proven by actions, and weigh one candidate against the other.

Here's what I think. If a person desires to be president, it should be a life goal, something that is struggled for, sweated over, planned for. From early on, his actions should be that of a future president. Everything matters in a candidate's history: college major, membership in organizations, choice of spouse, and voting records to name a few. The idea that all of this evidence can be dismissed because of the promises made on a stage or in front of a camera makes me crazy! I'm not that easily convinced. Call it pessimism if you'd like, but I prefer the term "cautiously optimistic." Yes, everyone is allowed a mistake, but as I've said before, we too often justify a pattern as an isolated incident. When it comes to choosing a president, I'd rather not give any candidate the benefit of the doubt, thank you. Don't let the media think for you! The future of the nation, my children and yours, and the world is altered by our choice of president. It is my hope that every voter makes an open-minded examination of the candidates and votes in line with their common sense rather than their emotions! 20 days and counting...

Truths

2008-10-14T20:29:00.000-07:00

I told my husband recently that anyone more conservative than I am is a fanatic. I believe in tradition, old fashion values, the American Dream, God. Married women have an obligation- nay, privilege- to support their husbands and children first-hand. Children are a responsibility, not a right, and too many couples treat their children as objects that can be shelved at day care and retrieved each evening at the convenience of the parent. Birth Control leads to promiscuity. Promiscuity disrespects marriage. Disrespect of marriage leads to divorce. As a nation, we need to stop giving fish to those who have none and teach them to fish instead. The ones who know how to fish should catch their own and teach others how to fish as well. Life begins at conception. Women too often think with their hearts; men too often think with... Teenagers cannot be trusted to make their own decisions 99% of the time. Fathers should teach their daughters to respect themselves. Mothers should teach their sons to respect women. Incidents and patterns are not the same. Patterns are often ignored or justified at incidents. There are too many stupid women in the world and too many weak men.